Sonntag, 30. November 2008
Sonntag, 16. November 2008
Sonntag, 28. September 2008
orange pants day
Well, regarding the last post... it was so la la.
Yesterday, however, saw one called "The Secrets" which was the best I'd seen so far....
It involved religion, an all-female seminary school, sadomasochism, art, rituals, and the intellectual vs. emotional. One of those films that makes one want to try to become Jewish. Two girls. A seminary school. A murdereress. Disease and hospital scenes. Purification rituals. Girls in bed. A realistic ending. I'd endorse that film. After that was a spot of dancing. It's funny here, well it happens all the time but I still find it funny... how everyone knows everyone else somehow.
Today was orange pants day, for moving stuff and then sorting it out and hooking things up to other things. Then a six-mile walk in the woods on a multi-use trail... a peachy sunset through the trees.... I heard the trees are all red, orange, and gold in CO... aha, now I know what season it is. They're all green here. Green and lush and rainforesty... but in the pacific northwest, one notices the markings of changing seasons by the arrival of the pumpkin spice latte, I have come to believe. Every so often, there was a rustle in the underbrush as though a snake thought about venturing onto the multi-use trail, before its ancestral imprintings warned it away; I am quite certain that many snakes have been smashed by bike tires there. That's where all the nutsoid bicyclists go past in flashes of spandex, but taper off into the evening. It is, however, still possible to envision oneself in a different country at a different time while traipsing along.
My theory is that the new baby elephant, Samudra, has two moms. I looked it up, and supposedly a full 45% of sexual behavior among asian elephants in zoos is homosexual behavior... one part may be that the elephants of different genders are kept in different places. Well, okay, that's according to Wikipedia's "homosexuality in animals" article. Samudra's mother, Rose, spends most of her time with Chendra, and the three of them make such a sweet, protective family together. Chendra seems to have taken on many childcare tasks. They run around in a little pod together in which Samudra is completely esconced from the public eye. And there certianly is a public eye to be had: one must wait in a line filled with screaming, wandering, bumping-into, ceaselessly questioning, small children with their parents. Then one has about 10 minutes to see the elephants before the appointed elephant guards usher one away. The zoo here has some other good animals, I have not been to one in about 15 years and it was interesting to go. But I would never ever ever go again on a Saturday.
At times, I've had the sense that sometimes professors like to play shakespearean games... for example, the game of the witches who pass the eye around. So that when one goes other places, or other countries, they passed the eye from one to the next to keep an eye on one, before passing it over to the next one. Auge auf, gut aufgepasst. Samudra must sometimes feel like a watched pot with these three female elephants paying such close attention to him, but much better that than the media, I think.
Yesterday, however, saw one called "The Secrets" which was the best I'd seen so far....
It involved religion, an all-female seminary school, sadomasochism, art, rituals, and the intellectual vs. emotional. One of those films that makes one want to try to become Jewish. Two girls. A seminary school. A murdereress. Disease and hospital scenes. Purification rituals. Girls in bed. A realistic ending. I'd endorse that film. After that was a spot of dancing. It's funny here, well it happens all the time but I still find it funny... how everyone knows everyone else somehow.
Today was orange pants day, for moving stuff and then sorting it out and hooking things up to other things. Then a six-mile walk in the woods on a multi-use trail... a peachy sunset through the trees.... I heard the trees are all red, orange, and gold in CO... aha, now I know what season it is. They're all green here. Green and lush and rainforesty... but in the pacific northwest, one notices the markings of changing seasons by the arrival of the pumpkin spice latte, I have come to believe. Every so often, there was a rustle in the underbrush as though a snake thought about venturing onto the multi-use trail, before its ancestral imprintings warned it away; I am quite certain that many snakes have been smashed by bike tires there. That's where all the nutsoid bicyclists go past in flashes of spandex, but taper off into the evening. It is, however, still possible to envision oneself in a different country at a different time while traipsing along.
My theory is that the new baby elephant, Samudra, has two moms. I looked it up, and supposedly a full 45% of sexual behavior among asian elephants in zoos is homosexual behavior... one part may be that the elephants of different genders are kept in different places. Well, okay, that's according to Wikipedia's "homosexuality in animals" article. Samudra's mother, Rose, spends most of her time with Chendra, and the three of them make such a sweet, protective family together. Chendra seems to have taken on many childcare tasks. They run around in a little pod together in which Samudra is completely esconced from the public eye. And there certianly is a public eye to be had: one must wait in a line filled with screaming, wandering, bumping-into, ceaselessly questioning, small children with their parents. Then one has about 10 minutes to see the elephants before the appointed elephant guards usher one away. The zoo here has some other good animals, I have not been to one in about 15 years and it was interesting to go. But I would never ever ever go again on a Saturday.
At times, I've had the sense that sometimes professors like to play shakespearean games... for example, the game of the witches who pass the eye around. So that when one goes other places, or other countries, they passed the eye from one to the next to keep an eye on one, before passing it over to the next one. Auge auf, gut aufgepasst. Samudra must sometimes feel like a watched pot with these three female elephants paying such close attention to him, but much better that than the media, I think.
Sonntag, 14. September 2008
events
It could be good, it could be bad, and it could be.... ?
http://www.plgff.org/2008Festival/schedule.html
only one way to find out.
http://www.plgff.org/2008Festival/schedule.html
only one way to find out.
Samstag, 13. September 2008
more views from here: the birds
last weekend, after hiking, the beach and gulls.
the swifts flying into the chimney
the chimney, before the swifts descended
views from here
The above picture is one I took at an art event by Siren Nation. It was my favorite picture of the evening.
The interior of the main Portland downtown library.
On a hike I took.
Me, hiking.
Also along the path.....
Montag, 8. September 2008
the swifts
first, a correction: the national hurricane center has an arbirtrary list of names to assign the hurricanes, and Gustav's number was up when the hurricane formed.
Now, the better stuff:
tonight went to see the swifts. They looked like this:
This took place during sunset, it reminded me of Prague. The people I was with were nice and brought picnic food, some had attended the event for years.
As they were finally flying into the chimney, what the audubon society (who had a table set up) said was a peregrine (it was truly hard to tell) flew in twice to get an unsuspecting swift as it was trying to go to bed. There were still some swifts lingering outside of the chimney when all the others were safely esconced, and my theory is that they had experienced some sort of chimney trauma at some point... I can't imagine how so many can fit in that space without anyone getting hurt somehow. Miraculous.
Now, the better stuff:
tonight went to see the swifts. They looked like this:
This took place during sunset, it reminded me of Prague. The people I was with were nice and brought picnic food, some had attended the event for years.
As they were finally flying into the chimney, what the audubon society (who had a table set up) said was a peregrine (it was truly hard to tell) flew in twice to get an unsuspecting swift as it was trying to go to bed. There were still some swifts lingering outside of the chimney when all the others were safely esconced, and my theory is that they had experienced some sort of chimney trauma at some point... I can't imagine how so many can fit in that space without anyone getting hurt somehow. Miraculous.
Montag, 1. September 2008
current events
First of all, what's with naming a hurricane "Gustav"? Is that supposed to evoke Mahler's music? I think it's just another thing used to scare U.S.A. people of those destructive, stormy, foreign, complicated, educated influences. The connotation is almost, "those degenerate hurricanes and forces of nature will be our downfall as a nation."
Second of all. Palin. She doesn't even care about the endangered polar bears, she wants to drill oil and destroy national park/forest/refuge to do so, and the whole snowmobile and mooseburger thing. I find her completely and totally problematic, for any number of reasons and from pretty much every angle. A friend wondered why she gave all her kids dog names. Okay, sex education was in some ways useless to me, as it pretty much excluded the dental dam, so I may be biased about its usefulness or applicability. If she's elected after I vote, I'll have a good reason to leave the U.S. again.
Second of all. Palin. She doesn't even care about the endangered polar bears, she wants to drill oil and destroy national park/forest/refuge to do so, and the whole snowmobile and mooseburger thing. I find her completely and totally problematic, for any number of reasons and from pretty much every angle. A friend wondered why she gave all her kids dog names. Okay, sex education was in some ways useless to me, as it pretty much excluded the dental dam, so I may be biased about its usefulness or applicability. If she's elected after I vote, I'll have a good reason to leave the U.S. again.
Sonntag, 24. August 2008
blog renovation underway
I've gotten bored with my blog.
I feel it's time for a change of thema.
Perhaps that will also involve a change of color.
Maybe some entries will disappear.
Maybe I'll make a new one and link to it here, or perhaps not.
In any event, some of my moods have changed from when I first created it. So I'm doing another blog reconaissance to find out more of what I like and dislike in blogs, and rethinking theme. I am hoping to be able to use the renovaton as an opportunity to coalesce a few main themes and to prune it of some others, so that it feels more alive to me.
I feel it's time for a change of thema.
Perhaps that will also involve a change of color.
Maybe some entries will disappear.
Maybe I'll make a new one and link to it here, or perhaps not.
In any event, some of my moods have changed from when I first created it. So I'm doing another blog reconaissance to find out more of what I like and dislike in blogs, and rethinking theme. I am hoping to be able to use the renovaton as an opportunity to coalesce a few main themes and to prune it of some others, so that it feels more alive to me.
Sonntag, 13. Juli 2008
on professional incest
This document spells out the unwritten contract between at least one former professor of mine at Bryn Mawr and students, and professors at my former graduate school and their graduate and undergraduate students. I think they need to include it with admissions material and all the other things one signs at the beginning of enrollment in the endeavour of pursuing a degree. This is because, in my experience, sexual openness to professors who want to use one is often a prerequisite for an advanced degree. Whether at Bryn Mawr, or large Universities such as UW, if you aren't sexually open to the professors who invite you to their cars at night, or the male ones who want only to stare at your breasts when you meet about projects, then you aren't allowed to get through the system.
STATEMENT OF INFORMED CONSENT FOR A SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN A TEACHING PROFESSIONAL AND A STUDENT
I, __________________, hereby consent to a sexual relationship with _____________________ (Professor), a licensed _________________, whose student I am or have been for the purpose of _________________.
In granting this consent, I understand that, although some such relationships are successful, all relationships between professors and students carry great risk. Such involvement may be accompanied by personal degradation by the professor, criticism of my relationship with-my current partner, and encouragement to isolate myself from other personal involvements. I understand also that the professor may not be in a monogamous relationship with me and that he/she is likely to suddenly terminate the relationship.
I understand that my entering this relationship may involve the forsaking of moral and intellectual values to which I have previously adhered with strong conviction. I understand that my feelings toward this professor may be based on a symbolic attraction, also known as transference, in that these feelings may be less related to my knowledge and understanding of him/her as a person than to his/her representation to me as a powerful, trustworthy, dependable, knowlegable figure who can provide for my intellectual and/or emotional needs. I understand also that the professor's feelings toward me may be based on a similar symbolic attraction, also known as countertransference. I understand that my dependence on this professor may compromise my ability to fully understand the basis of my feelings toward him/her or my ability to terminate the relationship even after I am no longer comfortable with it.
I understand that by engaging in this sexual relationship with me, this professor may be violating his/her code of professional and university ethics as well as certain laws of the state.
I understand that a sexual relationship with this professor may ultimately have extremely damaging consequences for me including, but not necessarily limited to, disruption and abandonment of degree plans, extreme discomfort and experience of a hostile environment in my degree program, feelings of betrayal, helplessness, anger, confusion, guilt, and depression, that these feelings could result in a need for psychiatric care, and that these feelings could possibly result in my suicide.
I understand that the anger and distrust that I may develop toward this professor may generalize to other academics or even to all people of the same gender or field as this professor.
In expressing these feelings to others, I may find that I derive little understanding or sympathy from present or future partners, members of my family, my friends, co-workers, other professors, or even helping professionals. I understand further that disclosure of my sexual involvement with this may result in my estrangement from some or all of these people, further increasing my feelings of loneliness, confusion, and guilt.
I understand that all of the aforementioned risks have been documented in previous sexual relationships between professors and their students.
I assert that these risks have been fully explained to me by a knowledgeable health or other professional other than the professor, that I am willing to accept these risks, and I freely and willfully give my informed consent to said sexual relationship.
Signed this _____ day of _____________, ____.
__________________________
(adapted from M. Plaut)
That's what the real price is for a degree.
STATEMENT OF INFORMED CONSENT FOR A SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN A TEACHING PROFESSIONAL AND A STUDENT
I, __________________, hereby consent to a sexual relationship with _____________________ (Professor), a licensed _________________, whose student I am or have been for the purpose of _________________.
In granting this consent, I understand that, although some such relationships are successful, all relationships between professors and students carry great risk. Such involvement may be accompanied by personal degradation by the professor, criticism of my relationship with-my current partner, and encouragement to isolate myself from other personal involvements. I understand also that the professor may not be in a monogamous relationship with me and that he/she is likely to suddenly terminate the relationship.
I understand that my entering this relationship may involve the forsaking of moral and intellectual values to which I have previously adhered with strong conviction. I understand that my feelings toward this professor may be based on a symbolic attraction, also known as transference, in that these feelings may be less related to my knowledge and understanding of him/her as a person than to his/her representation to me as a powerful, trustworthy, dependable, knowlegable figure who can provide for my intellectual and/or emotional needs. I understand also that the professor's feelings toward me may be based on a similar symbolic attraction, also known as countertransference. I understand that my dependence on this professor may compromise my ability to fully understand the basis of my feelings toward him/her or my ability to terminate the relationship even after I am no longer comfortable with it.
I understand that by engaging in this sexual relationship with me, this professor may be violating his/her code of professional and university ethics as well as certain laws of the state.
I understand that a sexual relationship with this professor may ultimately have extremely damaging consequences for me including, but not necessarily limited to, disruption and abandonment of degree plans, extreme discomfort and experience of a hostile environment in my degree program, feelings of betrayal, helplessness, anger, confusion, guilt, and depression, that these feelings could result in a need for psychiatric care, and that these feelings could possibly result in my suicide.
I understand that the anger and distrust that I may develop toward this professor may generalize to other academics or even to all people of the same gender or field as this professor.
In expressing these feelings to others, I may find that I derive little understanding or sympathy from present or future partners, members of my family, my friends, co-workers, other professors, or even helping professionals. I understand further that disclosure of my sexual involvement with this may result in my estrangement from some or all of these people, further increasing my feelings of loneliness, confusion, and guilt.
I understand that all of the aforementioned risks have been documented in previous sexual relationships between professors and their students.
I assert that these risks have been fully explained to me by a knowledgeable health or other professional other than the professor, that I am willing to accept these risks, and I freely and willfully give my informed consent to said sexual relationship.
Signed this _____ day of _____________, ____.
__________________________
(adapted from M. Plaut)
That's what the real price is for a degree.
Sonntag, 29. Juni 2008
royal (pain) geography
Today I took a hike up King's Mountain:
http://www.cooltrails.com/kingsmtn.htm
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/519465/oregon_hiking_kings_mountain.html
It was steep... though very short. I realized how out of shape I am and how my feet have changed since I last wore my hiking boots, and am already a little sore, but it was in fact spectacular. On a day when an earlier start is desired (today was not one of those days, being hot and my having things to do) and the peak bagged early in the day, it is possible to then visit the ocean for the rest of the afternoon. It's only about 45 minutes away from PDX.
Most of the trail is hip-high ferns beneath a canopy of moss-covered trees, which is enchanting to trek within. Then as it usually does, the scenery changed into typical alpine-region terrain as one ascends. There were also a number of flowers in season, including indian paintbrush, harebells (which had a lovely blue tinge), strawberry flowers (but no berries to be found). I did take two pictures of the moss and ferns, but too exhausted to think about uploading them now. I saw 6 other hikers during this jaunt, and no animals. I had to begin to wonder what sorts of animals there are here, for example, if there are snakes. It was a carbon-rich experience given the ferns and moss and trees.
I wonder if there is a Queen's mountain as well.
I had sort of missed being in Seattle during pride day, or at least the opportunity to boycott it, but had a (Drag of a) King of my own with some pretty interesting contours and natural features to sweat over, and so am happy. And in an earlier part of the day, interesting thoughts to be had about statuary.
http://www.cooltrails.com/kingsmtn.htm
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/519465/oregon_hiking_kings_mountain.html
It was steep... though very short. I realized how out of shape I am and how my feet have changed since I last wore my hiking boots, and am already a little sore, but it was in fact spectacular. On a day when an earlier start is desired (today was not one of those days, being hot and my having things to do) and the peak bagged early in the day, it is possible to then visit the ocean for the rest of the afternoon. It's only about 45 minutes away from PDX.
Most of the trail is hip-high ferns beneath a canopy of moss-covered trees, which is enchanting to trek within. Then as it usually does, the scenery changed into typical alpine-region terrain as one ascends. There were also a number of flowers in season, including indian paintbrush, harebells (which had a lovely blue tinge), strawberry flowers (but no berries to be found). I did take two pictures of the moss and ferns, but too exhausted to think about uploading them now. I saw 6 other hikers during this jaunt, and no animals. I had to begin to wonder what sorts of animals there are here, for example, if there are snakes. It was a carbon-rich experience given the ferns and moss and trees.
I wonder if there is a Queen's mountain as well.
I had sort of missed being in Seattle during pride day, or at least the opportunity to boycott it, but had a (Drag of a) King of my own with some pretty interesting contours and natural features to sweat over, and so am happy. And in an earlier part of the day, interesting thoughts to be had about statuary.
Sonntag, 1. Juni 2008
Houston, TX
Houston is hot. I had not realized there was so much culture here. It's my first time in Texas at all, and it's ok so far, there don't seem to be any mountains in sight, however. Here for a conference, but I'm not presenting this time... or rather, a trade show, my job is to be mobbed by job applicants and to REpresent. If time, may try to see the Holocaust Museum or the big park or other things... shaping up into a fun experience so far, have learned a ton on the job so far, and I'm sure will learn more in the next days. In retrospect, had I gone further into the groves of academia, I think I would have supported the cause of providing work cell phones and laptops to the professoriate. That I feel so technologically provided for at my job has been yet another perk; I never knew life could be like this.
Montag, 26. Mai 2008
the monday which was not a monday
My previous post now seems too harsh. I've begun to see more differences, the article below has been thought-provoking:
http://www.crosscurrents.org/miles.htm
Maybe some part also was the consistent feeling that like sand as one walks in the ocean, things kept eroding under my feet. The system is one way, I learned to understand, but when I return, it's completely different, and the entire structure of a degree has changed, so that it's a whole different experience for the new people, and I'm left feeling that what I did for it was no longer relevant, and that I needed to master other things retrospectively, but most of it I'd already mastered some in my free time, but the grist of it has changed too, and that's not something I had, either. Or maybe the feeling of always falling between the cracks of changes which were beyond my control, so something I felt I'd been led to believe was solid, continued to shift about and change hands, and I was told entirely different things about the very basics at different points, often, after I'd proceeded along a path which was in keeping with the earlier thing I'd been told. Transitions can often ultimately be good for people and organizations, but I think they also need to be discussed as such and not simply implemented without warning. Anyhow...
In other news, over the course of the weekend as my mom visited, we visited together 5 different wineries all over the place here, and now I have a more fine-tuned appreciation of wine components, though I have not picked a favorite. It was easy to imagine being in the Cinqueterra or Tuscany-- my memory of Grinzingen is far too clouded to evoke anything aside from a view over Vienna. This "wine tour" thing would be fun to do again at some point, I think; before, I had been a bit scared to venture too far afield, but now I think it looks more manageable. We also visited restaurants, which in my grad school days I would have not looked at as I walked down the street, given the unattainability of the prices. Now, however, I find I'm able to enjoy the food more, thinking that I might in fact now be able to engineer dinner for two there. The other worthwhile visit of the day was to the Japanese garden. My mom thinks I still have residual stress from academia and bought me a yearly pass to the Japanese garden, so that I can go and chill out among the zen artifacts and plants and tourists when I feel distraught.
Next week, back to the Oko-Haie, coffee, and reading resumes, with forseeably some new twists.
http://www.crosscurrents.org/miles.htm
Maybe some part also was the consistent feeling that like sand as one walks in the ocean, things kept eroding under my feet. The system is one way, I learned to understand, but when I return, it's completely different, and the entire structure of a degree has changed, so that it's a whole different experience for the new people, and I'm left feeling that what I did for it was no longer relevant, and that I needed to master other things retrospectively, but most of it I'd already mastered some in my free time, but the grist of it has changed too, and that's not something I had, either. Or maybe the feeling of always falling between the cracks of changes which were beyond my control, so something I felt I'd been led to believe was solid, continued to shift about and change hands, and I was told entirely different things about the very basics at different points, often, after I'd proceeded along a path which was in keeping with the earlier thing I'd been told. Transitions can often ultimately be good for people and organizations, but I think they also need to be discussed as such and not simply implemented without warning. Anyhow...
In other news, over the course of the weekend as my mom visited, we visited together 5 different wineries all over the place here, and now I have a more fine-tuned appreciation of wine components, though I have not picked a favorite. It was easy to imagine being in the Cinqueterra or Tuscany-- my memory of Grinzingen is far too clouded to evoke anything aside from a view over Vienna. This "wine tour" thing would be fun to do again at some point, I think; before, I had been a bit scared to venture too far afield, but now I think it looks more manageable. We also visited restaurants, which in my grad school days I would have not looked at as I walked down the street, given the unattainability of the prices. Now, however, I find I'm able to enjoy the food more, thinking that I might in fact now be able to engineer dinner for two there. The other worthwhile visit of the day was to the Japanese garden. My mom thinks I still have residual stress from academia and bought me a yearly pass to the Japanese garden, so that I can go and chill out among the zen artifacts and plants and tourists when I feel distraught.
Next week, back to the Oko-Haie, coffee, and reading resumes, with forseeably some new twists.
distance, new focus
with distance, I have learned to have compassion for a group I was formerly involved with-- or, perhaps, better not to call it compassion, but rather pity.
Such a desparate world, that calls for people to mutilate one another, to lie on a daily basis, to put on such extraordinary facades, to lie retrospectively, to complain about one another to their students on a daily basis, to show that their friendships are more important than the safety of their charges. I simply feel pity for the people in this world at this point. I guess I've gotten my taste of the whole academic shebang and have decided it's not worth the self-deception it would involve to think of it as something worthwhile, after 99% of my experiences.
In the meantime, more pictures:
Such a desparate world, that calls for people to mutilate one another, to lie on a daily basis, to put on such extraordinary facades, to lie retrospectively, to complain about one another to their students on a daily basis, to show that their friendships are more important than the safety of their charges. I simply feel pity for the people in this world at this point. I guess I've gotten my taste of the whole academic shebang and have decided it's not worth the self-deception it would involve to think of it as something worthwhile, after 99% of my experiences.
In the meantime, more pictures:
Sonntag, 18. Mai 2008
Grizzly Man
Yesterday, viewed Herzog's Grizzly Man.
It was somewhat depressing-- again Herzog featured many of his own ideas about nature in examining the deaths, I think I'd call this film of his one of his most acerbic. I think it's very likely that he saw himself in Tim Treadwell, including in terms of Treadwell's views of humanity and more-- Herzog seems to view himself as a sort of mentor to a dead person, who may or may not have wanted it-- another in the string of Herzog's conflicted relationships with other filmmakers. As seen in Walking to Werner, it seems that Herzog has little interest in mentoring other filmmakers, unless he can use them for his own stardom. I think he was quite invasive in Grizzly Man, also as he styled himself as a sort of god figure who warned Treadwell's former girlfriend to destroy the sound recording of the death in her own best interests. Maybe he could have done more with the Thoreau/Walden ideas. I don't think it's my favorite film of Herzog's; Encounters has still been my favorite of late.
Also saw Aida last week, but may or may not blog about it. It was excellent, in a word.
In other news, have been missing the libraries etc. in seattle these days.
It was somewhat depressing-- again Herzog featured many of his own ideas about nature in examining the deaths, I think I'd call this film of his one of his most acerbic. I think it's very likely that he saw himself in Tim Treadwell, including in terms of Treadwell's views of humanity and more-- Herzog seems to view himself as a sort of mentor to a dead person, who may or may not have wanted it-- another in the string of Herzog's conflicted relationships with other filmmakers. As seen in Walking to Werner, it seems that Herzog has little interest in mentoring other filmmakers, unless he can use them for his own stardom. I think he was quite invasive in Grizzly Man, also as he styled himself as a sort of god figure who warned Treadwell's former girlfriend to destroy the sound recording of the death in her own best interests. Maybe he could have done more with the Thoreau/Walden ideas. I don't think it's my favorite film of Herzog's; Encounters has still been my favorite of late.
Also saw Aida last week, but may or may not blog about it. It was excellent, in a word.
In other news, have been missing the libraries etc. in seattle these days.
Sonntag, 11. Mai 2008
The Counterfeiters
Yesterday saw the film The Counterfeiters, I guess in terms of concentration camp films there are others I'd prefer, such as Jakob der Luegner, and there are also other Austrian films I find better, but I'll still write some about this one. It dealt with the question of betraying one's friends vs. survival; the group stuck together, but the leader still took action to create the money demanded in a small quantity so that they weren't all killed. Also issues of criminality, privelege, etc. The end when the other camp inmates arrived and broke down the barriers between sections of the camp was also a well-done scene. I thought the very end was pretty lame, however.
Sonntag, 4. Mai 2008
meeting interesting plants
Today a long, five-mile sort of walk in the arboreteum. Mental note to go further from the city next time, others had the same idea today. But the arboreteum had an overlook and variety, and too many other things to do today to go much further. The highlight was the sunshine and the deep dark forest. Contemplation of the action of coming and going at once, which maybe works out into hereness.
tying, untying
One thing I've missed about Europe in May is the Tanz in den Mai, where in some places everyone dances in masks... or, other may day scenarios with poles to tie and untie, flower petals, strawberries, young Puritan girls singing "Son vergin vezzosa." Yesterday, after a so-la-la event at which I met some interesting people, I dreamt of masked balls.
Samstag, 3. Mai 2008
Encounters at the End of the World
Yesterday after work went to see Encounters at the End of the World, by Werner Herzog. They're having an enormous Herzog thing-- had had no idea that the Northwest Film Forum extends to here, but it does. I've seen pretty much all the rest of the ones being shown, except for a couple, and that was one of them.
This film takes place in Antarctica.
I loved it. Many gems... from the penguin conversations to the echoes of Bells from the Deep (another favorite of mine) as the scientists prostrate themselves on the ice to listen to the seals below, to the spiritual experiences of diving beneath the ice and collecting creatures, to the linguistics ex-PhD who had to end his research because the last speaker of the dying language he was studying died. Herzog focuses a little on global warming, but then turns it into a focus on the death of humans, dying languages and dying cultures. Also echoes of White Diamond. He does in fact show some cultural awareness when he discusses these things, such as the aztec indian guy, but pretty much everyone is a curiosity object to him as Herzog tries to show how McMurdo is filled with oddballs, and constantly striving oddballs with extreme worldviews. He also gets bored with his subjects and their tales, often interrupting them while filming them to do a voice over "to make a long story short... this, this and this happened." Cut. Next. I pretty much laughed my ass off through the entire thing. The humor is not coming off very well here as I tell about it. I did in fact inspire me briefly to want to go to Antarctica, but I think there are many good reasons to stay in this hemisphere now.
The theater was packed and then when I stood up at the end (I had come about 5 minutes late and sat down in the dark), it was very strange because I found I was surrounded by people speaking German. At first I thought I was hallucinating, but then I asked them in German who they were, it's some group affiliated with the German-American preeschool here. That encounter reminded me of wine and wisdom events, especially when I then went home and had a glass of wine, but it was fun and totally unstressful and I didn't feel any pressure to pimp the field.
Today is one of those times I wish to have a cat curl up on my lap and rest there for awhile. Meow.
This film takes place in Antarctica.
I loved it. Many gems... from the penguin conversations to the echoes of Bells from the Deep (another favorite of mine) as the scientists prostrate themselves on the ice to listen to the seals below, to the spiritual experiences of diving beneath the ice and collecting creatures, to the linguistics ex-PhD who had to end his research because the last speaker of the dying language he was studying died. Herzog focuses a little on global warming, but then turns it into a focus on the death of humans, dying languages and dying cultures. Also echoes of White Diamond. He does in fact show some cultural awareness when he discusses these things, such as the aztec indian guy, but pretty much everyone is a curiosity object to him as Herzog tries to show how McMurdo is filled with oddballs, and constantly striving oddballs with extreme worldviews. He also gets bored with his subjects and their tales, often interrupting them while filming them to do a voice over "to make a long story short... this, this and this happened." Cut. Next. I pretty much laughed my ass off through the entire thing. The humor is not coming off very well here as I tell about it. I did in fact inspire me briefly to want to go to Antarctica, but I think there are many good reasons to stay in this hemisphere now.
The theater was packed and then when I stood up at the end (I had come about 5 minutes late and sat down in the dark), it was very strange because I found I was surrounded by people speaking German. At first I thought I was hallucinating, but then I asked them in German who they were, it's some group affiliated with the German-American preeschool here. That encounter reminded me of wine and wisdom events, especially when I then went home and had a glass of wine, but it was fun and totally unstressful and I didn't feel any pressure to pimp the field.
Today is one of those times I wish to have a cat curl up on my lap and rest there for awhile. Meow.
Mittwoch, 30. April 2008
collected things
the luminescent ones, barnacled and eroded outer shells, pearled interiors
all of them
each below is about the size of a dollar coin.
they could look sort of platonic together there, I suppose.
all of them
each below is about the size of a dollar coin.they could look sort of platonic together there, I suppose.
Dienstag, 29. April 2008
Not to make any assumptions about anyone, but I can't resist adding this link today.
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/02/24/75-threatening-to-move-to-canada/
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/02/24/75-threatening-to-move-to-canada/
Sonntag, 27. April 2008
sea air
Here are some of the things I saw today, a deep lush forest surrounds the area, found some intact sand dollars, smoothed rocks, shells. Cold still in the area, which explains the absence of beach-goers.... a short drive, comparative to others. My company was both comforting and completely unsympathetic... direct quote: "the idea of "transitions" is bullshit. Nobody else in the world needs time to adapt to things, you shouldn't either (unspoken: as my progeny, I don't want you to waste time on "transitions" and I will try to force you not to... in other words, here's how you should feel)." Me: "Well, you're the one who asked, if you don't like the answer, that's your &#&%(# problem." Followed by silence, the 1.5 hour-long sort. The landscape was stunning.
Samstag, 26. April 2008
Mlle. Cha-U-Kao and her milieu
Today saw the below picture at an exhibit called "The Dancer" which featured Degas, Toulouse-Lautrec, and Forain. Featuring three artists at a time rather than two was a little much, I think. The exhibit did well to discuss the historical context and fin-de-siecle Paris, however, even with an extensive historical timeline and some Lumiere films playing in some sections, for example the "Fire Dance" film. There were also portaits of opera scenes, even one scene from Aida. Otherwise, ballerinas everywhere, and two whole rooms full of pictures of ballerinas being hit on by the rich gentlemen who purchased passes of some sort to go backstage and consort with them, which the artists critiqued with great attention to power dynamics and the pressures for ballerinas to Plié (sp to whatever those men wanted, the price sometimes being their jobs if they refused. Anyhow... the below picture features Mlle. Cha-U-Kao, who also performed sometimes as a clown, but here below, dancing with another woman at the Moulin Rouge. Many portaits also featured the difficult lives of ballerinas behind the scenes, themes of spectatorship (views from the front boxes), and the beauty of the dancing, flower-like dancers with tutus and limbs aligned, in tension, and on the verges of movement. Then went to see a few other permanent exhibits. A busy & fun day with some company. Perhaps even more fun than maybe one or two other things I could think of to be doing, and fed my intellect.
Sonntag, 20. April 2008
a quantity of flowers from today
One should play the below while viewing the slideshow. The flower endeavours begin.
Donnerstag, 17. April 2008
two images
I don't know what these Chagalls are named, but I wanted to put them here today. I like the top one more right now. My chat area of my mail server has not been working for the last days because I need to clear my browser cache and have been quite busy.
Dienstag, 15. April 2008
conference policy
I have decided to draft some policy which pertains to academic conferences.
1) Conference-goers who have engaged in legal action against any member or former member of a department should not attend functions at the institution where the person is a department member unless 2 years have passed after the last legal action. 2 years is the standard amount of time given for consent to be meaningful for former clients to be involved in fair personal relationships with former fiduciaries after terminating, thus, such a clause would cover all department members, unless one wanted to distinguish between department members who had different power relationships over one another, ie, professors of equal rank and professors and graduate students. Why "former members"? Because ties still conceivably exist between the former member and colleagues/friends/people who had a vested interest in that member, and any involvement could still be construed as disruption of these relationships, cause of conflict of interest, and disruption of professional progress.
2) The same as #1 goes for attending conferences at an institution if one has initated romantic overtures towards a department or former department member or had any sort of romantic connection, dated from the last correspondence, depending upon rank and also depending upon how much power one person may be described as having over another, in terms of rank. Unless one person is of equal rank with another, the person who is not a current department member should not attend at all.
3) Where a department is involved as a whole, no department members should at any time be required to conduct activities which do not pertain to teaching and learning, for example, serving coffee to others who outrank them. It is not within the scope of their professional duties to do so, even as a "favor" or "entertainment chore."
4) There should be at least two options of panels to attend, should any interpersonal conflicts exist in which any department member is for any reason barred attendance.
5) Meetings of committees should not overlap with conference panels. Thus, all committee members are free to give all panels equal attention as merited.
6) If personal problems or circumstances seem to demand that an individual breach the confidentiality of any individual at the conference who is outranked by him or her, to still others who outrank the latter individual, the former individual should not attend the conference. Even if breaches of confidentiality may seem to serve the "best interests" of the outranked individual, other means should be pursued to resolve whatever needs to be addressed.
7) Questions of rank don't pertain to co-enjoyment the opera or "being at the opera in spirit."
1) Conference-goers who have engaged in legal action against any member or former member of a department should not attend functions at the institution where the person is a department member unless 2 years have passed after the last legal action. 2 years is the standard amount of time given for consent to be meaningful for former clients to be involved in fair personal relationships with former fiduciaries after terminating, thus, such a clause would cover all department members, unless one wanted to distinguish between department members who had different power relationships over one another, ie, professors of equal rank and professors and graduate students. Why "former members"? Because ties still conceivably exist between the former member and colleagues/friends/people who had a vested interest in that member, and any involvement could still be construed as disruption of these relationships, cause of conflict of interest, and disruption of professional progress.
2) The same as #1 goes for attending conferences at an institution if one has initated romantic overtures towards a department or former department member or had any sort of romantic connection, dated from the last correspondence, depending upon rank and also depending upon how much power one person may be described as having over another, in terms of rank. Unless one person is of equal rank with another, the person who is not a current department member should not attend at all.
3) Where a department is involved as a whole, no department members should at any time be required to conduct activities which do not pertain to teaching and learning, for example, serving coffee to others who outrank them. It is not within the scope of their professional duties to do so, even as a "favor" or "entertainment chore."
4) There should be at least two options of panels to attend, should any interpersonal conflicts exist in which any department member is for any reason barred attendance.
5) Meetings of committees should not overlap with conference panels. Thus, all committee members are free to give all panels equal attention as merited.
6) If personal problems or circumstances seem to demand that an individual breach the confidentiality of any individual at the conference who is outranked by him or her, to still others who outrank the latter individual, the former individual should not attend the conference. Even if breaches of confidentiality may seem to serve the "best interests" of the outranked individual, other means should be pursued to resolve whatever needs to be addressed.
7) Questions of rank don't pertain to co-enjoyment the opera or "being at the opera in spirit."
Sonntag, 13. April 2008
Diving Bell & Butterfly
Today I saw The Diving Bell and the Butterfly. Someone had told me it was an uplifting film, but I thought it was very sad. I did feel lucky to be able to move and talk and so on on my own after all of the claustrophobic scenes. Such extremes of isolation.
Have not been able to concentrate very well; I think that after certain parts of the year are very stressful for a number of years consecutively, just the seasonal change itself can bring on emotions which are not really related to daily/weekly expereince, but instead, products of and reactions to things which may have happened long ago, but to which one cannot react at the time without risking big things. This can also be triggered off by events near and far (or a combination of both). So it's been important to try to reenvision springtime and to try to stretch myself and to ignore the things which no longer apply to me, but which "would have."
Have not been able to concentrate very well; I think that after certain parts of the year are very stressful for a number of years consecutively, just the seasonal change itself can bring on emotions which are not really related to daily/weekly expereince, but instead, products of and reactions to things which may have happened long ago, but to which one cannot react at the time without risking big things. This can also be triggered off by events near and far (or a combination of both). So it's been important to try to reenvision springtime and to try to stretch myself and to ignore the things which no longer apply to me, but which "would have."
Mittwoch, 2. April 2008
Temptations of Holy Antonius
Today after a busy day at some of my workplaces, I went here. (Picture above)
Picture after picture of an older woman tempting St. Antonius by offering him a younger one, combined with demons which are combinations of various animals and other things. What I think is that the guy must have been gay, or really had some complexes. He was torn up and simply aufgefressen by the desire he must reject while adhering to his book. Most often, he was in a grotto.
It's pretty funny, the women painted as temptresses are coming from everywhere; one is even lying naked under a rug at his feet. They showed how the depiction of his struggle evolved in works by different painters over time, from pre-Bosch to Max Ernst and Otto Dix, for example. Then I toured the Rathaus and had some Alsterwasser sitting in some collonades on the Alster and visited a perfume store before returning to my relatives, at which point I reeked of all kinds of different colognes and perfumes because I couldn't decide on a definitive scent for awhile, or even whether I wanted it to be more masculine or more feminine.
Also saw some good exhibits in Berlin, went to a party, ran all around the city and even saw a performance of the Sorrows of Young Werther done for this century. Time there both exhausted and energized me, and reminded again that I wouldn't want to live there permanently, but rather visit for awhile. It's too big! There are too many people! I just love being able to do the language things and people not asking me at all anymore if they should speak English; perhaps faster on the draw of whipping out some German rather than just standing there looking shy and foreign. Still getting used to the new profession and its people, feel there's room to grow.
Samstag, 29. März 2008
T. Storm & the dykes
Today I visited Theodor Storm's house, the highlights of which were his cool desk and his Biedermeier sofa (with a mahogany backing, described in one of his pieces, have forgotten which at the moment). I also learned a few things; I'd had no idea of his Briefweschel with Turgenev, not to mention with Moreike and Gottfried Keller (grüne Heinrich discussion inklusiv) as well as a few others I hadn't heard of before: some Kuh guy from Austria and a few female poets and writers. I guess he was influenced by Goethe & Eichendorff, though he didn't like Eichendorff later on. Hmph.
The most troubling parts of the exhibit were these small dolls, in small cradles, covered with glass, which were distributed in different rooms. They looked like open coffins with mannequins inside. The other troubling part was that all of the furniture seemed to match and the rooms were painted nicely (his library, originall 4,000 books, but now fewer because of private collections elsewhere) was cherokee red. It was difficult to tell what was original and what the Storm Gesellschaft had actually put there just because it looked authentic, and the exhibit didn't do much to differentiate beyond the sofa, his desk, and both wives' desk. I have also now broadened my postcard collection; I usually only get postcards when I travel because they're small and light. Of course his poems and ones by others were hung about, pictures too..... I took some pictures while in the area, but I'm not up to uploading and posting just now.
Then walked along the harbor out to where the sea is, and there were dykes made of grass to be had everywhere. They looked like good, strong dykes. I couldn't imagine any sort of normal flood being able to overtake the biceps of mounded earth which enclosed the green pasture areas leading up to the town. I could barely want for masterful dykes under those circumstances. The sea was also good to see, and the fresh sea air was good for me, as well as the long walk alongside nature (though in retrospect I would have rented a bike; bikes on dykes, or would that be dyke on bike on dyke. The tidal plane was covered with green fields and grazing sheep; the snow had melted over the week I spent in the area and by then end I could see the purple crocuses which had sprung back to life in places. This was all lovely, as I was in a bad mood in the morning and after that, it evaporated. Such sweet baby sheep with their moms prancing about. I also think that these wind turbines which are scattered about are good for people: just watching them for awhile can have the same effect as EMDR, I think. Maybe that's why the Germans are in better moods than I remember; they've all had turbine therapy.
After this I passed by the castle and then caught my train. By then, or rather, by 7am this morning, everyone else in my course had left, and I had some solitude in the town without invitations to do stuff during every free moment. My pants had started falling down and I'd forgotten my belt, so I got one of those, and I also could not find my EC card before leaving the U.S., so have been wrangling with my bank in MS to try to get some of the money I stored there, a thing which demands dealing with bureaucracy, faxes, id, and lots of papers. It's been a hassle, but hopefully can be clarified next week. The thing I love about the concept of the business trip is the 'flights and hotel paid' and the 'per diem allowance' parts. That has certainly been a new and delightful thing.
Also got to visit Luneburg (the Luneburg of the Luneberger Heide song) with my Hamburg relatives on Easter, a lovely medieval city with some interesting pieces of architecture. What was interesting was that the houses were so old, that the earth had moved and the full weight of the house succumbed to gravity throughout the centuries, and there were large bulges of bricks and windows, making for seemingly misshapen brick structures everywhere. There was also of course a moat and a mill to be had. Next week is more time in Hamburg doing business things before flying back. These days, am esconced in another big city which I've pulled on this evening like a warm woolen sweater and get for 3 more days.
The most troubling parts of the exhibit were these small dolls, in small cradles, covered with glass, which were distributed in different rooms. They looked like open coffins with mannequins inside. The other troubling part was that all of the furniture seemed to match and the rooms were painted nicely (his library, originall 4,000 books, but now fewer because of private collections elsewhere) was cherokee red. It was difficult to tell what was original and what the Storm Gesellschaft had actually put there just because it looked authentic, and the exhibit didn't do much to differentiate beyond the sofa, his desk, and both wives' desk. I have also now broadened my postcard collection; I usually only get postcards when I travel because they're small and light. Of course his poems and ones by others were hung about, pictures too..... I took some pictures while in the area, but I'm not up to uploading and posting just now.
Then walked along the harbor out to where the sea is, and there were dykes made of grass to be had everywhere. They looked like good, strong dykes. I couldn't imagine any sort of normal flood being able to overtake the biceps of mounded earth which enclosed the green pasture areas leading up to the town. I could barely want for masterful dykes under those circumstances. The sea was also good to see, and the fresh sea air was good for me, as well as the long walk alongside nature (though in retrospect I would have rented a bike; bikes on dykes, or would that be dyke on bike on dyke. The tidal plane was covered with green fields and grazing sheep; the snow had melted over the week I spent in the area and by then end I could see the purple crocuses which had sprung back to life in places. This was all lovely, as I was in a bad mood in the morning and after that, it evaporated. Such sweet baby sheep with their moms prancing about. I also think that these wind turbines which are scattered about are good for people: just watching them for awhile can have the same effect as EMDR, I think. Maybe that's why the Germans are in better moods than I remember; they've all had turbine therapy.
After this I passed by the castle and then caught my train. By then, or rather, by 7am this morning, everyone else in my course had left, and I had some solitude in the town without invitations to do stuff during every free moment. My pants had started falling down and I'd forgotten my belt, so I got one of those, and I also could not find my EC card before leaving the U.S., so have been wrangling with my bank in MS to try to get some of the money I stored there, a thing which demands dealing with bureaucracy, faxes, id, and lots of papers. It's been a hassle, but hopefully can be clarified next week. The thing I love about the concept of the business trip is the 'flights and hotel paid' and the 'per diem allowance' parts. That has certainly been a new and delightful thing.
Also got to visit Luneburg (the Luneburg of the Luneberger Heide song) with my Hamburg relatives on Easter, a lovely medieval city with some interesting pieces of architecture. What was interesting was that the houses were so old, that the earth had moved and the full weight of the house succumbed to gravity throughout the centuries, and there were large bulges of bricks and windows, making for seemingly misshapen brick structures everywhere. There was also of course a moat and a mill to be had. Next week is more time in Hamburg doing business things before flying back. These days, am esconced in another big city which I've pulled on this evening like a warm woolen sweater and get for 3 more days.
Samstag, 22. März 2008
Osterspaziergang
now in frankfurt, killing a little time before my next flight northwards. the entire felleuton of die zeit is about goethe, and how the first part of faust will have it´s 200th b-day this year on easter, along with the poem ´vom eise befreit´ from the österspaziergang monolog, which i love and find fitting.
also,
'To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.'
- Farmers' Almanac
And the next installment, now from Hamburg:
a cartoon which is funny to me because the whole flight thing required so much telephone time, not to mention the telephone time on my job, and I've learned to really appreciate good hold music.
Vor dem Tor
Vom Eise befreit sind Strom und Bäche(Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Faust I)
Durch des Frühlings holden, belebenden Blick,
Im Tale grünet Hoffnungsglück;
Der alte Winter, in seiner Schwäche,
Zog sich in rauhe Berge zurück.
Von dort her sendet er, fliehend, nur
Ohnmächtige Schauer körnigen Eises
In Streifen über die grünende Flur.
Aber die Sonne duldet kein Weißes,
Überall regt sich Bildung und Streben,
Alles will sie mit Farben beleben;
Doch an Blumen fehlts im Revier,
Sie nimmt geputzte Menschen dafür.
Kehre dich um, von diesen Höhen
Nach der Stadt zurück zu sehen!
Aus dem hohlen finstern Tor
Dringt ein buntes Gewimmel hervor.
Jeder sonnt sich heute so gern.
Sie feiern die Auferstehung des Herrn,
Denn sie sind selber auferstanden:
Aus niedriger Häuser dumpfen Gemächern,
Aus Handwerks- und Gewerbesbanden,
Aus dem Druck von Giebeln und Dächern,
Aus der Straßen quetschender Enge,
Aus der Kirchen ehrwürdiger Nacht
Sind sie alle ans Licht gebracht.
Sieh nur, sieh! wie behend sich die Menge
Durch die Gärten und Felder zerschlägt,
Wie der Fluß in Breit und Länge
So manchen lustigen Nachen bewegt,
Und, bis zum Sinken überladen,
Entfernt sich dieser letzte Kahn.
Selbst von des Berges fernen Pfaden
Blinken uns farbige Kleider an.
Ich höre schon des Dorfs Getümmel,
Hier ist des Volkes wahrer Himmel,
Zufrieden jauchzet groß und klein:
Hier bin ich Mensch, hier darf ichs sein!
also,
'To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.'
- Farmers' Almanac
And the next installment, now from Hamburg:
a cartoon which is funny to me because the whole flight thing required so much telephone time, not to mention the telephone time on my job, and I've learned to really appreciate good hold music.
Sonntag, 9. März 2008
a social debut & poster-klepto confession
My weekend has been better. I attended my first hot flash party. I even got some digits, but I think they were not my type. The main reason was the motorcycle story. This woman told about an ex who had wanted to drive the motorcycle. This was the cause of their breakup, because the woman was completely unwilling to let her drive, and called herself an old school type. Her friend was the same. But then she made fun of the ex because the ex eventually fulfilled her dream to drive a motorcycle in the dykes on bikes pdx with her new girlfriend on the back. But the kicker was that the woman had not learned how to turn the motorcycle and didn't trust herself to do so, so she went by only once and that was that. We all felt sorry for the new girlfriend on the back. This was funny and I laughed, but I am also the sort of person who would want to drive from time to time, though not all the time. Anyway, they want to go roller skating with me sometime. As long as everyone's got their own wheels, that could be fun... but then there's the whole into football element, which I don't really care to hang out with. They were about 47 and 53, but the age gap doesn't bother me so much. Also, after the whole motorcycle story I realized I was wearing the wrong undies; because I need to do laundry I'd taken to wearing boxers, which gave me quite a thrill, makes me feel a bit more butch and is very comfortable and freeing, so even after I do laundry today I may continue this practice.
Here's a moment of confession.
Today I will discuss about an episode relating to film.
I will tell about a magical moment which transpired while I was in college.
I had come upstairs from my job in the basement of a building, and looked down the hall. There she was, oh my god, pinning a film poster to the wall. I stood still and literally couldn't move as entranced as I was by this action of her pinning a poster to the wall. And then she looked at me and said "Hi! I am putting up a film poster" (she always explained in-depth what she was doing) and smiled flirtatiously, which produced on my part what I'm sure are referred to as "googley eyes." It's always the small things. I wanted to be poster, pushpin, and wall all at once. I subsequently did get pinned to the wall, but that's another story. Then a different day I passed her door, and she had pinned a poster to it, too. The poster was for "Jungfraumaschine." I nearly passed out after seeing the film, at which she sat one row in front of me and looked at me throughout the introduction. And I made sure to see all other related films on my own. Sometimes when nobody was looking, I would actually take copies of the posters from the wall and hoard them, keeping them tucked away in a manila folder and adoring the moment when I touched the very pushpin she had touched. I in fact took one pushpin one time and kept it in a ziploc bag with the posters. I always felt a bit guilty about taking about one poster each week, so I tried to repay this debt to society later on by making and then posting some other new posters. It's definitely an art.
Here's a moment of confession.
Today I will discuss about an episode relating to film.
I will tell about a magical moment which transpired while I was in college.
I had come upstairs from my job in the basement of a building, and looked down the hall. There she was, oh my god, pinning a film poster to the wall. I stood still and literally couldn't move as entranced as I was by this action of her pinning a poster to the wall. And then she looked at me and said "Hi! I am putting up a film poster" (she always explained in-depth what she was doing) and smiled flirtatiously, which produced on my part what I'm sure are referred to as "googley eyes." It's always the small things. I wanted to be poster, pushpin, and wall all at once. I subsequently did get pinned to the wall, but that's another story. Then a different day I passed her door, and she had pinned a poster to it, too. The poster was for "Jungfraumaschine." I nearly passed out after seeing the film, at which she sat one row in front of me and looked at me throughout the introduction. And I made sure to see all other related films on my own. Sometimes when nobody was looking, I would actually take copies of the posters from the wall and hoard them, keeping them tucked away in a manila folder and adoring the moment when I touched the very pushpin she had touched. I in fact took one pushpin one time and kept it in a ziploc bag with the posters. I always felt a bit guilty about taking about one poster each week, so I tried to repay this debt to society later on by making and then posting some other new posters. It's definitely an art.
Sonntag, 2. März 2008
the golden belly
There's a Buddhist monastery in my neighborhood, and it looks gorgeous from the outside. So I dedided to go in today as I went for a walk, and as I had not been feeling very well, despite some good mail this week. I just felt I could do with a big belly to rest my head on a bit, some 8-fold path action, and some enlightenment.
They have an outdoors garden with a koi pond and statues and a gazebo with an enormous Buddha in the middle. One is not allowed to feed the foot-long goldfish. There are all sorts of interior rooms, all designed with a lot of feng shui in mind, and then an enormous palatial chanting room at the very back. In the chanting room, there are places to kneel, books in Sanskrit, and another enormous golden Buddha with offerings of fruit on the altars along with burning incense. The fruits were pineapples, avocadoes, and bananas. It felt pretty holy.
I also liked to talk with the buddhist monks and nuns who were wandering around and who told me about the place, which is largely staffed by volunteers. They also gave me a free Buddhist book. Maybe I'll go do a meditation ritual there one of these days. The experience also inspired me to do things like wash the dishes, which, if done correctly, can probably be a zen action.
They have an outdoors garden with a koi pond and statues and a gazebo with an enormous Buddha in the middle. One is not allowed to feed the foot-long goldfish. There are all sorts of interior rooms, all designed with a lot of feng shui in mind, and then an enormous palatial chanting room at the very back. In the chanting room, there are places to kneel, books in Sanskrit, and another enormous golden Buddha with offerings of fruit on the altars along with burning incense. The fruits were pineapples, avocadoes, and bananas. It felt pretty holy.
I also liked to talk with the buddhist monks and nuns who were wandering around and who told me about the place, which is largely staffed by volunteers. They also gave me a free Buddhist book. Maybe I'll go do a meditation ritual there one of these days. The experience also inspired me to do things like wash the dishes, which, if done correctly, can probably be a zen action.
Samstag, 23. Februar 2008
changing worlds, cont'd
Today was another crash day, but a long one; you know you're in the corporate world when you wake up naturally at 7am or earlier on a Saturday and are actually ready to get out of bed.
Yesterday an interesting thing happened; I was sitting there doing my work, and a German who was working with the group stopped in, and we chatted a bit, and he needed help with some text on his computer. So I helped him out a bit, and then went to run errands. When I returned, there was a bouquet of flowers sitting on my desk, and I didn't know who had brought them. The guy eventually said that he wanted to thank me for my help, and that I reminded him of an ex of his. He was very sweet, but a little discomfiting when he took up residence in the chair in the waiting area with his computer and just sat there looking at me, mentioning from time to time how remarkable the similarity was. Anyway, he's left the country now. Work is still very exciting, but also consuming....
The really interesting thing I experience on a continual basis is a sense of collaboration at work, which is really something I haven't experienced in a long time, and something I envied about my first roomie last year as he was a grad student in the sciences, where there is collaboration. We're all pretty interdependent at work, and interpersonal relationships are really cared for. That's been very nice.
out to go find some culture.
Yesterday an interesting thing happened; I was sitting there doing my work, and a German who was working with the group stopped in, and we chatted a bit, and he needed help with some text on his computer. So I helped him out a bit, and then went to run errands. When I returned, there was a bouquet of flowers sitting on my desk, and I didn't know who had brought them. The guy eventually said that he wanted to thank me for my help, and that I reminded him of an ex of his. He was very sweet, but a little discomfiting when he took up residence in the chair in the waiting area with his computer and just sat there looking at me, mentioning from time to time how remarkable the similarity was. Anyway, he's left the country now. Work is still very exciting, but also consuming....
The really interesting thing I experience on a continual basis is a sense of collaboration at work, which is really something I haven't experienced in a long time, and something I envied about my first roomie last year as he was a grad student in the sciences, where there is collaboration. We're all pretty interdependent at work, and interpersonal relationships are really cared for. That's been very nice.
out to go find some culture.
Mittwoch, 20. Februar 2008
Mondfinsternis II
Well, the moon is now high in the sky and all white again.
I did see the Mondfinsternis. First I was on the bus on the way home from work (busy day, 8-6:30, translated intensive techinical document, did office stuff, started with the company webpage) and saw it through the window, partially orange.
Then returned home and watched it through the lilac branches outside of my window. Then went to 7-11 for dinner and wine, got a tuna sandwich and wine and they were playing Balkan nusic. Mentioned to a guy I crossed the street with "check out the moon" and he did and told me of his desire to see it from a building, which was my buidling. So I said, let's try to go to the roof, and we did, and we made it, despite the rental company's warnings that it was not allowed. His name is Alex and he's a professional photographer and has long hair and looks like the guy Orlando ended up with in Ornaldo. My photographs of the orange moon are not good at all because I don't have a telephotic lens.
I liked seeing the orange, and the way the moon looked like the czech symbol of the smileys over the letters for a brief time while red on top. Like for once one could see some of the contours and details of the moon without so much white glare. Beautiful.
No idea what part of the menstrual cycle I'm on these days, can't feel much corresponde to it on that level. Off to the Columbia River tomorrow. Miss lectures about art history and so on.
I did see the Mondfinsternis. First I was on the bus on the way home from work (busy day, 8-6:30, translated intensive techinical document, did office stuff, started with the company webpage) and saw it through the window, partially orange.
Then returned home and watched it through the lilac branches outside of my window. Then went to 7-11 for dinner and wine, got a tuna sandwich and wine and they were playing Balkan nusic. Mentioned to a guy I crossed the street with "check out the moon" and he did and told me of his desire to see it from a building, which was my buidling. So I said, let's try to go to the roof, and we did, and we made it, despite the rental company's warnings that it was not allowed. His name is Alex and he's a professional photographer and has long hair and looks like the guy Orlando ended up with in Ornaldo. My photographs of the orange moon are not good at all because I don't have a telephotic lens.
I liked seeing the orange, and the way the moon looked like the czech symbol of the smileys over the letters for a brief time while red on top. Like for once one could see some of the contours and details of the moon without so much white glare. Beautiful.
No idea what part of the menstrual cycle I'm on these days, can't feel much corresponde to it on that level. Off to the Columbia River tomorrow. Miss lectures about art history and so on.
Montag, 18. Februar 2008
two films
At the filmfest, I saw XXY (Argentina) and Yella (Germany).
XXY was well-done, the story of an intersex teenager and two families. The location was gorgeous, and the contrast between the two families as well, and the incorporation of nature. Alex's character was extremely well-played. The rape scene was terrible, it reminded me of grad school except that in her case it was brute force rather than professional power which was used to intimidate and torment her. The film addressed the issues surrounding the intersex experience well, and used simple language to do so. A great alternative to Herculine Barbin.
Yella was also very good, with an ambiguous ending. I did like the negotiating scenes, but the end compelled me to wonder what the film was doing with the interplay of materialism and death. If one has to be dead in some way to be a successful capitalist. Also, the trauma and the terrible ex-boyfriend who kept showing up was poignant and well-portrayed in terms of the increased sensitivity to nature and her spacing out at points, and her conflicted emotions about her stalking ex. The other thing it did well was show differences between the former east and former west. The stereotype is of venture capitalists from the former west being carpetbaggers in the former east and cashing in on government subsidies, but this film seems to go the other way around as the woman from the former east profits from dealings in the former west. I think this can be explored further, as these questions also play out in the interpersonal relationships. I could really relate to parts of it, and it was an interesting and successful film, but not my favorite, and it was depressing.
XXY was well-done, the story of an intersex teenager and two families. The location was gorgeous, and the contrast between the two families as well, and the incorporation of nature. Alex's character was extremely well-played. The rape scene was terrible, it reminded me of grad school except that in her case it was brute force rather than professional power which was used to intimidate and torment her. The film addressed the issues surrounding the intersex experience well, and used simple language to do so. A great alternative to Herculine Barbin.
Yella was also very good, with an ambiguous ending. I did like the negotiating scenes, but the end compelled me to wonder what the film was doing with the interplay of materialism and death. If one has to be dead in some way to be a successful capitalist. Also, the trauma and the terrible ex-boyfriend who kept showing up was poignant and well-portrayed in terms of the increased sensitivity to nature and her spacing out at points, and her conflicted emotions about her stalking ex. The other thing it did well was show differences between the former east and former west. The stereotype is of venture capitalists from the former west being carpetbaggers in the former east and cashing in on government subsidies, but this film seems to go the other way around as the woman from the former east profits from dealings in the former west. I think this can be explored further, as these questions also play out in the interpersonal relationships. I could really relate to parts of it, and it was an interesting and successful film, but not my favorite, and it was depressing.
Samstag, 16. Februar 2008
Handel's Rodelinda
For Valentine's Day, I went to see Rodelinda.
It was fabulous. The set was spare with much framing and white shapes.
I had never heard a castrato live before.
The costumes were amazing with the enormous true-to-life wide frame skirts and corsets, they were in fact stunning. This was followed by a brief question and answer period with the director and the singer who played Rodelinda. The most stunning part was the duet sung by Rodelinda and her husband, who was played by a woman, which closed act 2. I think it surpasses the Lakme Opera in parts. The enterprise lasted 4 hours all together.
Here's another version:
and here:
It was fabulous. The set was spare with much framing and white shapes.
I had never heard a castrato live before.
The costumes were amazing with the enormous true-to-life wide frame skirts and corsets, they were in fact stunning. This was followed by a brief question and answer period with the director and the singer who played Rodelinda. The most stunning part was the duet sung by Rodelinda and her husband, who was played by a woman, which closed act 2. I think it surpasses the Lakme Opera in parts. The enterprise lasted 4 hours all together.
Here's another version:
and here:
Sonntag, 10. Februar 2008
perambulation
Today I've had some fun exploring Hawthorne, which is my new neighborhood. One has to walk up and down the main streets and learn what's where.
I've also planned out my week more, also in terms of the films I will see, and when the opera.
The other interesting thing I've learned is that there is no sales tax here.
Still minorly disoriented and vertiginous from moving, but it's gotten better.
One big thing has been the different time orientation.
My orientation to time was always a bit different, I think, but the whole corporate thing seems much more to be about immediacy. What to the academic world may seem to be simply leaning on the panic button, but in other ways, it really forces one to be in the now. Then my other time orientations can just go on swirling around that one.
I've also planned out my week more, also in terms of the films I will see, and when the opera.
The other interesting thing I've learned is that there is no sales tax here.
Still minorly disoriented and vertiginous from moving, but it's gotten better.
One big thing has been the different time orientation.
My orientation to time was always a bit different, I think, but the whole corporate thing seems much more to be about immediacy. What to the academic world may seem to be simply leaning on the panic button, but in other ways, it really forces one to be in the now. Then my other time orientations can just go on swirling around that one.
Samstag, 9. Februar 2008
Akin's The Edge of Heaven/Wie die anderen leben
What a great afternoon.
I went to see Akin's The Edge of Heaven / Wie die Anderen leben at the PIFF.
It's my favorite film of his so far, we'll see if that sentiment holds up after the novelty wears off. What perhaps also made a difference is having been almost everywhere the film was filmed-- except for some of the smaller cities in Turkey.
Not only was it existential and ripe for discussion hand-in-hand with Pamuk's work (the academic turned bookseller from the small town in Turkey who started out living in Germany with the narrator of Pamuk's Snow) but there were even some good Frau-Frau scenes, and not only that, but also girls in the slammer, and even the leaving academia moment! I found the entire work quite exciting. Revolution-inklusiv. As the story developed, the end actually seemed to fit, though the whole time and throughout all of the crossed paths, I was plugging for things to actually work out in terms of the different peoples' goals, and oddly, the different goals were in fact met, but not by the people who wanted to meet them, it seems. . How Germany meets Turkey, through a variety of relationships in which both elements are always represented in the different interactions. The word Edge in the title is, I think, integral to discussing it, there are so many edges of different realities, edges which always seem to almost meet, but not quite. What I also found pretty neat was the whole Goethe element: the discussion of Goethe's reaction to the revolution as being like a rose in winter (which then totally explains Hofmannsthal's discussion of a rose in winter) and also in terms of the Werther-Lotte element, and Lotte of course dies. But the German dies in Turkey. That was some good sturm and drang. Instead of Lotte in Weimar, we have Lotte in Istanbul. I also loved the element of how all of these mourning episodes then turn into travel stories, and the sending of caskets back and forth between countries. Still thinking about it.
I'm too excited about it at the moment to feel very coherent, but I will supply a clip, in which the girlfriend hangs out with her girlfriend's mother:
h
I went to see Akin's The Edge of Heaven / Wie die Anderen leben at the PIFF.
It's my favorite film of his so far, we'll see if that sentiment holds up after the novelty wears off. What perhaps also made a difference is having been almost everywhere the film was filmed-- except for some of the smaller cities in Turkey.
Not only was it existential and ripe for discussion hand-in-hand with Pamuk's work (the academic turned bookseller from the small town in Turkey who started out living in Germany with the narrator of Pamuk's Snow) but there were even some good Frau-Frau scenes, and not only that, but also girls in the slammer, and even the leaving academia moment! I found the entire work quite exciting. Revolution-inklusiv. As the story developed, the end actually seemed to fit, though the whole time and throughout all of the crossed paths, I was plugging for things to actually work out in terms of the different peoples' goals, and oddly, the different goals were in fact met, but not by the people who wanted to meet them, it seems. . How Germany meets Turkey, through a variety of relationships in which both elements are always represented in the different interactions. The word Edge in the title is, I think, integral to discussing it, there are so many edges of different realities, edges which always seem to almost meet, but not quite. What I also found pretty neat was the whole Goethe element: the discussion of Goethe's reaction to the revolution as being like a rose in winter (which then totally explains Hofmannsthal's discussion of a rose in winter) and also in terms of the Werther-Lotte element, and Lotte of course dies. But the German dies in Turkey. That was some good sturm and drang. Instead of Lotte in Weimar, we have Lotte in Istanbul. I also loved the element of how all of these mourning episodes then turn into travel stories, and the sending of caskets back and forth between countries. Still thinking about it.
I'm too excited about it at the moment to feel very coherent, but I will supply a clip, in which the girlfriend hangs out with her girlfriend's mother:
h
Donnerstag, 7. Februar 2008
but I like to pump my own....
After crashing, picked myself up and went into the week, not helped by a couple of nights where I just couldn't sleep. Now more balanced, know my work better and neighborhood and so on, things are starting to be more familiar and have met a few more people. It's really funny, you can't get your own gas here. Someone has to do it for you. I find this really strange. Just between states, it is sort of foreign. I am also heartened some by the turnouts of the primaries so far.
Some good news; my German relatives from southern DE, with whom I spent a vacation and a christmas (one of my favorite christmases ever), are coming to visit the U.S. in the summer and to meet my Granddad and other relatives-- his cousin, the father of one of them, died in the last couple of years. My granddad's simply delighted, which is lovely. So I will visit too to interpret and translate, since the Germans don't speak much english, and as my family speaks about zero german, apart from my granddad, who is fluent. Then they're going to tour around in the U.S. for a bit on their own and I'm helping to find some German-language things for them and to organize who's when where in terms of my family members in CO.
It's interesting how much confidence I've gained on the job already. I have a nice boss who's proactive, a good person, and with strong interpersonal skills, and that's always welcome. Learning much.
Some good news; my German relatives from southern DE, with whom I spent a vacation and a christmas (one of my favorite christmases ever), are coming to visit the U.S. in the summer and to meet my Granddad and other relatives-- his cousin, the father of one of them, died in the last couple of years. My granddad's simply delighted, which is lovely. So I will visit too to interpret and translate, since the Germans don't speak much english, and as my family speaks about zero german, apart from my granddad, who is fluent. Then they're going to tour around in the U.S. for a bit on their own and I'm helping to find some German-language things for them and to organize who's when where in terms of my family members in CO.
It's interesting how much confidence I've gained on the job already. I have a nice boss who's proactive, a good person, and with strong interpersonal skills, and that's always welcome. Learning much.
Montag, 4. Februar 2008
today simply crashed, have been going nonstop for awhile, and it was time to crash and even a migraine all afternoon, and got all triggered off again by a newsletter I thought I'd unsubscribed from and that hurt. tried to get out for a walk and to see the hood, but couldn't do much. I think I just need to meet people here. it's like leaping from a sense of groundlessness into another sense of groundlessness, and scary. I like my colleagues and the job is interesting, but it was a pretty hard crash. drinking tea and trying to be mellow.
Samstag, 2. Februar 2008
the hammer, the screwdriver, and me
Phew... today I built five bookshelves and put my books into them, hung pictures, and built a thing to go under the sink, and hung curtains. I think it's looking better.....
Mittwoch, 30. Jänner 2008
hats
I've been getting used to operating in the corporate world... an adjustment, and generally cool. It's allowed me to abandon some of the stereotypes I had about it, I meet interesting people in my building every day, on the elevator or other places.
I've realized that I'm several people there rolled into one: translator, interpreter, HR, archivist, interior designer and office manager. It's fun to have so much variety.... but sometimes I look at the publications and at the meeting rooms, and realize that it's all men in there in the top positions, and that I'm doing things which are more stereotypically female. Which makes me wonder how to break through that, and I've decided to study more about how this may be done, the top of the list being increasing my portfolio of computer capabilities, to zero in more on what's needed there to be a computer guy or top management as well. It's actually sort of invigorating; my grad school composition was largely female, and it didn't really feel that I was doing anything new or pioneering in terms of being a grad student there. At the same time, at the time I entered, needed a bit of respite, which did not work out to be quite that, but perhaps was able to find it between the cracks... Had another female colleague in the office today, and interviewed her about her background and so on to find out more about how she ended up at the building site, which is 95% male, at least. For now I'm a fly on the wall figuring out how things are done, and doing what my skills allow me to, and being inventive where my experience fails, and it's not been difficult. So, aok so far...
I've realized that I'm several people there rolled into one: translator, interpreter, HR, archivist, interior designer and office manager. It's fun to have so much variety.... but sometimes I look at the publications and at the meeting rooms, and realize that it's all men in there in the top positions, and that I'm doing things which are more stereotypically female. Which makes me wonder how to break through that, and I've decided to study more about how this may be done, the top of the list being increasing my portfolio of computer capabilities, to zero in more on what's needed there to be a computer guy or top management as well. It's actually sort of invigorating; my grad school composition was largely female, and it didn't really feel that I was doing anything new or pioneering in terms of being a grad student there. At the same time, at the time I entered, needed a bit of respite, which did not work out to be quite that, but perhaps was able to find it between the cracks... Had another female colleague in the office today, and interviewed her about her background and so on to find out more about how she ended up at the building site, which is 95% male, at least. For now I'm a fly on the wall figuring out how things are done, and doing what my skills allow me to, and being inventive where my experience fails, and it's not been difficult. So, aok so far...
Sonntag, 27. Jänner 2008
opera babes
It's pretty neat. They're doing a "powerful women of the stage" series.
They've already done Carmen and Cinderella, coming up are Rodelinda and Aida.
Here's what they write about each:
Carmen: She's free. She's wild. And she's fearless.
Cinderella: She’s sweet. She’s tender. She’s gracious beyond belief.
Rodelinda: She's powerful. She's dependable. And she's smart.
Aida: She's passionate. She's trapped. And she's torn.
source: http://www.portlandopera.org/
They sound a little like Barbie ads.
I will nonetheless be checking out Rodelinda and Aida.
They've already done Carmen and Cinderella, coming up are Rodelinda and Aida.
Here's what they write about each:
Carmen: She's free. She's wild. And she's fearless.
Cinderella: She’s sweet. She’s tender. She’s gracious beyond belief.
Rodelinda: She's powerful. She's dependable. And she's smart.
Aida: She's passionate. She's trapped. And she's torn.
source: http://www.portlandopera.org/
They sound a little like Barbie ads.
I will nonetheless be checking out Rodelinda and Aida.
Samstag, 26. Jänner 2008
Maslow's hierarchy
Here's a diagram of Maslow's hierarchy of needs.
I think that, being a hierarchy, it's also built in some ways for sustaining existence within hierarchies.
In grad school, it seemed that I never really felt I had safety needs met. This is now better for me, but I continue to recognize, with experience, just how key many of these things are.
I think that, being a hierarchy, it's also built in some ways for sustaining existence within hierarchies.
In grad school, it seemed that I never really felt I had safety needs met. This is now better for me, but I continue to recognize, with experience, just how key many of these things are.
Dienstag, 22. Jänner 2008
gelandet
Phew. Now the internet is set up at home.
Yesterday was moved in as of 11:15, then returned the truck and got the car.
Then I went into work and did some things, though the internet has been down there both yesterday and today.
So today I went to the lawyer's office-- they set me up with a workspace and laptop and coffee and so on-- to do some translations they needed for a visa, it was 19 pages of payroll documents for which one needs to know the correct translations for tax codes. It was also neat to meet the lawyers, and all 19 pages are done.
Excited about the team, both in the office itself and extended, a good mix of Germans and non-Germans, small to start with. My building's downtown, with a view, on an upper level, can very easily catch a bus across the bridge & to work. On the other hand, it's one of the first places which would be bombed, or the building next door would be, should anyone wish to bomb it.
Also excited about my new place. It's a 1-bedroom on the second floor, #207, hardwood floors, an old building. On the corner of the building, great morning sun, windows all along the east and south sides, from my bedroom a terrific northeseast view. Everyone-- the people I hired for $20/hr to help me move in, the internet guy, etc. have been taken with the place and asked me what the rent is, and when I tell them, reply that it's reasonable. I think that I would never have found a comprable place in S-town for the same amount.
Long days and sleepy.
Yesterday was moved in as of 11:15, then returned the truck and got the car.
Then I went into work and did some things, though the internet has been down there both yesterday and today.
So today I went to the lawyer's office-- they set me up with a workspace and laptop and coffee and so on-- to do some translations they needed for a visa, it was 19 pages of payroll documents for which one needs to know the correct translations for tax codes. It was also neat to meet the lawyers, and all 19 pages are done.
Excited about the team, both in the office itself and extended, a good mix of Germans and non-Germans, small to start with. My building's downtown, with a view, on an upper level, can very easily catch a bus across the bridge & to work. On the other hand, it's one of the first places which would be bombed, or the building next door would be, should anyone wish to bomb it.
Also excited about my new place. It's a 1-bedroom on the second floor, #207, hardwood floors, an old building. On the corner of the building, great morning sun, windows all along the east and south sides, from my bedroom a terrific northeseast view. Everyone-- the people I hired for $20/hr to help me move in, the internet guy, etc. have been taken with the place and asked me what the rent is, and when I tell them, reply that it's reasonable. I think that I would never have found a comprable place in S-town for the same amount.
Long days and sleepy.
Sonntag, 20. Jänner 2008
U-haul disappearing into the sunset-- truck girl
today: difficult day.
first: tire change. oil change. they wanted to do more to the vehicle, but I said tell me what you think needs to be done, and I'll look into it in P-town.
then: u-haul car trailer enterprise. goal: get car attached to U-haul truck. Truck: parked in eastlake. me and car: had stayed overnight in greenlake. U-haul branch: Rainier Valley.
called u-haul branch to see where I could pick up the trailer I'd reserved. Were busy and said they'd call me back. I hang out for an hour with my book and some coffee. Called 411 and got dir. listings for other U-haul places in Seattle. Chose the most convenient one. Tried them four different times over an hour and nobody picked up the phone. Tried original branch again, again they took my number and said they'd call back. Frustrated, called the 1-800 Uhaul number. Expressed need to get trailer asap at convenient location. Nobody seemed to really know anything. Transferred 4 times, and eventually hung up on. Frustration level is red-hot. Decide to just drive to Rainier Valley. Stand in line. They say they need the actual truck present to do anything. It's two bus connections... on a Sunday. Hey, at least got to see Benaroya again. Get U-haul truck from Eastlake and drive it to Rainier Valley. Wait in line. They wanted to give me one of three trailers, on all of which the winches were too rusty to use. I reached boiling point and threw a fit. The woman in uniform who was heading the enterprise said to give me the new one, the good and working one, which had just come in. I put my car onto the trailer and hooked everything up, and chained and winched it.
Hopped into the truck.
Got on I-5 at 4pm.
Drove off into a beautiful sunset listening to some international music station, first indian than irish.
I actually like driving a truck, one can do 70mph quite easily, unless there's wind, in which case it becomes difficult to steer. Made it to P-town at night, drove my car off the trailer, unhooked it, dropped it off, parked my car securely there. Transferred belongings from car to truck, on the way, a plate broke. A good omen for a start of a new relationship with a new city and new company.... Then found a hotel near the rental agency. Have found some wine and have the moving guys I found on craig's list set to go tomorrow early after I sign some papers. Didn't end up in the lovely Queen Marie, but nearby, which is also close to work.
For awhile lost The White Castle, which had fallen between the passenger seat and the door, and in the meantime, on the bus, started another book I had in my bag, The Illusionist-- not the one which was made into a film, but the French one, in which the 15 year old girl is seduced by her father's mistress. I found that at Third Sister Books (I think that's what it's called...) in Vancouver... loved the preface, and chapter 1...
first: tire change. oil change. they wanted to do more to the vehicle, but I said tell me what you think needs to be done, and I'll look into it in P-town.
then: u-haul car trailer enterprise. goal: get car attached to U-haul truck. Truck: parked in eastlake. me and car: had stayed overnight in greenlake. U-haul branch: Rainier Valley.
called u-haul branch to see where I could pick up the trailer I'd reserved. Were busy and said they'd call me back. I hang out for an hour with my book and some coffee. Called 411 and got dir. listings for other U-haul places in Seattle. Chose the most convenient one. Tried them four different times over an hour and nobody picked up the phone. Tried original branch again, again they took my number and said they'd call back. Frustrated, called the 1-800 Uhaul number. Expressed need to get trailer asap at convenient location. Nobody seemed to really know anything. Transferred 4 times, and eventually hung up on. Frustration level is red-hot. Decide to just drive to Rainier Valley. Stand in line. They say they need the actual truck present to do anything. It's two bus connections... on a Sunday. Hey, at least got to see Benaroya again. Get U-haul truck from Eastlake and drive it to Rainier Valley. Wait in line. They wanted to give me one of three trailers, on all of which the winches were too rusty to use. I reached boiling point and threw a fit. The woman in uniform who was heading the enterprise said to give me the new one, the good and working one, which had just come in. I put my car onto the trailer and hooked everything up, and chained and winched it.
Hopped into the truck.
Got on I-5 at 4pm.
Drove off into a beautiful sunset listening to some international music station, first indian than irish.
I actually like driving a truck, one can do 70mph quite easily, unless there's wind, in which case it becomes difficult to steer. Made it to P-town at night, drove my car off the trailer, unhooked it, dropped it off, parked my car securely there. Transferred belongings from car to truck, on the way, a plate broke. A good omen for a start of a new relationship with a new city and new company.... Then found a hotel near the rental agency. Have found some wine and have the moving guys I found on craig's list set to go tomorrow early after I sign some papers. Didn't end up in the lovely Queen Marie, but nearby, which is also close to work.
For awhile lost The White Castle, which had fallen between the passenger seat and the door, and in the meantime, on the bus, started another book I had in my bag, The Illusionist-- not the one which was made into a film, but the French one, in which the 15 year old girl is seduced by her father's mistress. I found that at Third Sister Books (I think that's what it's called...) in Vancouver... loved the preface, and chapter 1...
Samstag, 19. Jänner 2008
flats and sharps
back to s-town w/o incident, didn't do anything exciting before leaving because of all the sleet, snow, and rain.... got a flat tire somehow in S-town while running errands, so trying to get it fixed when everything's closed has been an endeavour. the best to be done, it seems, is a temporary fix and now I worry about all the toxic chemicals I got on my hands with this spray stuff called "fix a flat." had wanted to sauna or dance tonight, but not to be. found friend to stay with. still scheduled to drive south tomorrow, but now with a tire change scheduled beforehand. I did not find anything sharp in my tire, though I looked, and wonder how it happened, but it was really hissing away whenever I stopped.
Freitag, 18. Jänner 2008
adventures in V-town cont'd
last night cruised around on davie street for awhile & ate dinner there. a very international mix of options.
today slept in and then, since the art museum is closed on several floors for work, travelled directly to chinatown and walked about-- I like it much more than I like the chinatown in S-town. from there to the police museum, was not expecting a ton of interest, but was pleasantly surprised by an extensive and gory autopsy room, a history of violent unsolved and solved crime in vancouver (the "babes in the wood" murder of two young boys in stanley park, for example... or the man who killed his wife over time by giving her arsenic-laced white spot milkshakes, and more, along with forensic materials & procedures and various other crime apparati. The illegal weapons part was also interesting, the sorts of implements of torture you'd see in Xena.) I also liked the exhibition about policewomen and the evolving role of the policewomen over time, replete with pictures. this trip has been great so far in terms of girls in uniform. The police museum also sold handcuffs, but I decided to put that off. I didn't spend much time in the fake slammer, but in general the museum was fun.
From there, went to Commercial Drive and walked the entirety of that and then back up again, stopping for coffee, and when I felt like I needed to sit down for a bit, stopped to get a haircut and now my head is lighter with four or five inches of hair gotten rid of. I do like this Canadian accent, but in general there's so much of an international population that I've only come across that accent a handful of times.
Then I returned to where I'm staying and stopped to shop along the way. It's a great time to shop, because they're having their winter clearance sales and I was able to find an outfit, the best part of which is a versatile purple blouse. I was too afraid to go much further than one outfit without an objective fashion consultant on hand. that, and I couldn't put myself through much more shopping.
public transportation is great, it's been fine to leave the automobile in the locked & gated parking garage where I've been staying.
Now reading Pamuk's The White Castle.
I guess I'll be driving out tomorrow, maybe stopping at the suspended bridges and treehouse community or in victoria along the way. with more time, perhaps a night in victoria could be fun. In other news, enjoyed this interesting news story on my google reader. I didn't know my new work was enconomist material quite yet, and was pleasantly surprised by that.
today slept in and then, since the art museum is closed on several floors for work, travelled directly to chinatown and walked about-- I like it much more than I like the chinatown in S-town. from there to the police museum, was not expecting a ton of interest, but was pleasantly surprised by an extensive and gory autopsy room, a history of violent unsolved and solved crime in vancouver (the "babes in the wood" murder of two young boys in stanley park, for example... or the man who killed his wife over time by giving her arsenic-laced white spot milkshakes, and more, along with forensic materials & procedures and various other crime apparati. The illegal weapons part was also interesting, the sorts of implements of torture you'd see in Xena.) I also liked the exhibition about policewomen and the evolving role of the policewomen over time, replete with pictures. this trip has been great so far in terms of girls in uniform. The police museum also sold handcuffs, but I decided to put that off. I didn't spend much time in the fake slammer, but in general the museum was fun.
From there, went to Commercial Drive and walked the entirety of that and then back up again, stopping for coffee, and when I felt like I needed to sit down for a bit, stopped to get a haircut and now my head is lighter with four or five inches of hair gotten rid of. I do like this Canadian accent, but in general there's so much of an international population that I've only come across that accent a handful of times.
Then I returned to where I'm staying and stopped to shop along the way. It's a great time to shop, because they're having their winter clearance sales and I was able to find an outfit, the best part of which is a versatile purple blouse. I was too afraid to go much further than one outfit without an objective fashion consultant on hand. that, and I couldn't put myself through much more shopping.
public transportation is great, it's been fine to leave the automobile in the locked & gated parking garage where I've been staying.
Now reading Pamuk's The White Castle.
I guess I'll be driving out tomorrow, maybe stopping at the suspended bridges and treehouse community or in victoria along the way. with more time, perhaps a night in victoria could be fun. In other news, enjoyed this interesting news story on my google reader. I didn't know my new work was enconomist material quite yet, and was pleasantly surprised by that.
Donnerstag, 17. Jänner 2008
Stanley Park
Today I spent all day wandering around Stanley Park.
I'm a little cold still, but it was worthwhile to walk around in the forest and around the circumference and also around Beaver Pond. Marshland and noteworthy trees, no time to describe further at this point. The activities they have in the park are sort of blah, aside from walking about, I think.
It's very nice in terms of parks, but I'm a bit jaded or simply spoiled in terms of beautiful places. I feel the call of the expanse of wilderness around me and maybe I'll travel into the mountains.
I think I'll hit the Davis street next or tomorrow, am staying on the Robson shopping district, great for people watching. I absolutely hate shopping but think I ought to put myself through at least a little bit of it with my new job in mind. Maybe a good time to see a film or two, if the weather sucks again tomorrow.
Last night finished my book, On Beauty by Zadie Smith, and time to choose the next one.
I'm not going to get into a prolonged diatribe about On Beauty just now, other than to say it's great, and is a timely thing to read given the Clinton/Obama debates and other current events.
I love reading at a paced rate and enjoying it. The guy I hired to help me load up the U-haul was sort of shocked that half of the space filled in the van was filled with boxes of books, he was like, God, read much? Why don't you start a library, you could make money that way? He agreed with me that the yellow German book boxes are a good concept, after moving all 14 of those as compared with various other boxes (I'd hit up the liquor store for lots of free empty boxes as well) I'd filled with books, which ranged from a bit to significantly heavier. I simply have not been able to give them up, they are coming with me. The thing which I think was the most of a pain in the ass for him was the filing cabinet. My belongings only filled about half the truck to begin with and loading it only took an hour, and my car is also only half-full of things, but still. I had kept out just one box of books and other publications until the very end as a 'just in case I had some free time' measure, that's a thing which is now in my car, and I'm glad for that.
My move-in date has now been moved to 8am on Monday morning because nobody's at work on Sunday. It's a place I'm sure I want, otherwise would have ditched it and the rental company by now for elsewhere.
Have also been able to do some organizational things for my new job from afar and feel I'm on task in that regard........
I'm a little cold still, but it was worthwhile to walk around in the forest and around the circumference and also around Beaver Pond. Marshland and noteworthy trees, no time to describe further at this point. The activities they have in the park are sort of blah, aside from walking about, I think.
It's very nice in terms of parks, but I'm a bit jaded or simply spoiled in terms of beautiful places. I feel the call of the expanse of wilderness around me and maybe I'll travel into the mountains.
I think I'll hit the Davis street next or tomorrow, am staying on the Robson shopping district, great for people watching. I absolutely hate shopping but think I ought to put myself through at least a little bit of it with my new job in mind. Maybe a good time to see a film or two, if the weather sucks again tomorrow.
Last night finished my book, On Beauty by Zadie Smith, and time to choose the next one.
I'm not going to get into a prolonged diatribe about On Beauty just now, other than to say it's great, and is a timely thing to read given the Clinton/Obama debates and other current events.
I love reading at a paced rate and enjoying it. The guy I hired to help me load up the U-haul was sort of shocked that half of the space filled in the van was filled with boxes of books, he was like, God, read much? Why don't you start a library, you could make money that way? He agreed with me that the yellow German book boxes are a good concept, after moving all 14 of those as compared with various other boxes (I'd hit up the liquor store for lots of free empty boxes as well) I'd filled with books, which ranged from a bit to significantly heavier. I simply have not been able to give them up, they are coming with me. The thing which I think was the most of a pain in the ass for him was the filing cabinet. My belongings only filled about half the truck to begin with and loading it only took an hour, and my car is also only half-full of things, but still. I had kept out just one box of books and other publications until the very end as a 'just in case I had some free time' measure, that's a thing which is now in my car, and I'm glad for that.
My move-in date has now been moved to 8am on Monday morning because nobody's at work on Sunday. It's a place I'm sure I want, otherwise would have ditched it and the rental company by now for elsewhere.
Have also been able to do some organizational things for my new job from afar and feel I'm on task in that regard........
Mittwoch, 16. Jänner 2008
homeless, now in Canada
The adventures continue.
Moved out of the apt. for good this morning, and, did all I needed to do in Seattle, including returning my library books, a case where one parks as close to the library as possible and runs over to drop them in the drop slot before jetting away from campus.
Then I learned that where I'm moving into in P-town won't actually be ready for me to move into it until Sunday, though it was supposed to be ready sooner. I need to do some orientation activities for work on Monday, but officially start on Wednesday, so Sunday will still work for moving in.
So after digesting this, I sat in my car in Volunteer Park for an hour as though I were some bum cruiser and decided what to do while checking out the view and making calls and going through papers. No place to live for the next four days. Camping at this time of year is out of the question, my handful of friends in Seattle seemed all tied up, and the ones in P-town as well. So I decided to make an adventure of it. After visiting the greenhouse and climbing the water tower, I hopped in the car and drove by my U-haul truck to make sure it was parked and locked securely, and then got onto I-5, but instead of going south as I had planned, I went north.
At the border to Canada about two hours later, I had to go through customs. They pulled me over and did a complete vehicle search and background check, because it bothered them that a) I had no current permanent residence, b) I had many belongings in my car (they were afraid I would try to emigrate illegally, I think) c) I was alone and don't know anyone in Canada, d) I wasn't sure where I would be staying in Vancouver, e) I wasn't quite sure how long I'd be there f) all the strange foreign visas in my passport, g) the car is not yet registered to me, but actually to my dad as I buy it from him, etc. I didn't have any firearms or pepper spray or narcotics, so that cleared the way some. They even almost called my dad to validate that I was allowed to take the car across the border; apparently, one usually needs a letter of permission to do that, and had a narcotics dog investigate my car. I got a full interrogation of about 30 questions from fully armed customs officials, who seemed most confused by the fact that it's a rather spontaneous trip. The female ones were actually pretty cute, in keeping with my ongoing life theme of girls in uniform. Anyway, I got through that after explaining the situation a couple of times (and also explaining some of my life history as they tried to figure out what the hell the different langauges and Erlaubinsse in my passport were all about) with a warning to leave my belongings at home the next time I came, to have a permanent address, to have a letter about being allowed to bring the car across the border, and so on. They also didn't seem to believe me about the U-haul, so I had to show them my U-haul reservation forms, and the contact info of the leasing agency in P-town and my job offer letter. All of this bureaucracy excites me all the more to have my very own army of stamps in my new job to stamp all the cross-cultural paperwork with. I've decided to get a personal stamp too, which looks offical, just as a backup thing to have in situations like the above.
Anyway, about 30 or 40 minutes later I was on my way again and arrived in Vancouver. Visited tourist info and found an inexpensive place to stay. Deciding what to do here-- it really is a gorgeous place, just a bit chilly. Am glad to finally get a chance to visit, would have taken much longer to get here all the way from P-town.
Moved out of the apt. for good this morning, and, did all I needed to do in Seattle, including returning my library books, a case where one parks as close to the library as possible and runs over to drop them in the drop slot before jetting away from campus.
Then I learned that where I'm moving into in P-town won't actually be ready for me to move into it until Sunday, though it was supposed to be ready sooner. I need to do some orientation activities for work on Monday, but officially start on Wednesday, so Sunday will still work for moving in.
So after digesting this, I sat in my car in Volunteer Park for an hour as though I were some bum cruiser and decided what to do while checking out the view and making calls and going through papers. No place to live for the next four days. Camping at this time of year is out of the question, my handful of friends in Seattle seemed all tied up, and the ones in P-town as well. So I decided to make an adventure of it. After visiting the greenhouse and climbing the water tower, I hopped in the car and drove by my U-haul truck to make sure it was parked and locked securely, and then got onto I-5, but instead of going south as I had planned, I went north.
At the border to Canada about two hours later, I had to go through customs. They pulled me over and did a complete vehicle search and background check, because it bothered them that a) I had no current permanent residence, b) I had many belongings in my car (they were afraid I would try to emigrate illegally, I think) c) I was alone and don't know anyone in Canada, d) I wasn't sure where I would be staying in Vancouver, e) I wasn't quite sure how long I'd be there f) all the strange foreign visas in my passport, g) the car is not yet registered to me, but actually to my dad as I buy it from him, etc. I didn't have any firearms or pepper spray or narcotics, so that cleared the way some. They even almost called my dad to validate that I was allowed to take the car across the border; apparently, one usually needs a letter of permission to do that, and had a narcotics dog investigate my car. I got a full interrogation of about 30 questions from fully armed customs officials, who seemed most confused by the fact that it's a rather spontaneous trip. The female ones were actually pretty cute, in keeping with my ongoing life theme of girls in uniform. Anyway, I got through that after explaining the situation a couple of times (and also explaining some of my life history as they tried to figure out what the hell the different langauges and Erlaubinsse in my passport were all about) with a warning to leave my belongings at home the next time I came, to have a permanent address, to have a letter about being allowed to bring the car across the border, and so on. They also didn't seem to believe me about the U-haul, so I had to show them my U-haul reservation forms, and the contact info of the leasing agency in P-town and my job offer letter. All of this bureaucracy excites me all the more to have my very own army of stamps in my new job to stamp all the cross-cultural paperwork with. I've decided to get a personal stamp too, which looks offical, just as a backup thing to have in situations like the above.
Anyway, about 30 or 40 minutes later I was on my way again and arrived in Vancouver. Visited tourist info and found an inexpensive place to stay. Deciding what to do here-- it really is a gorgeous place, just a bit chilly. Am glad to finally get a chance to visit, would have taken much longer to get here all the way from P-town.
Sonntag, 13. Jänner 2008
Pagliacci
Pagliacci was great, sat in the very back, but enjoyed it, though had forgotten my glasses which I need to see distances well with my left eye. It was intense and I cried. Quite a switch from Iphigenia, didn't grab me in quite the same way, perhaps becuase it was simply so clear. I do like this Nuccia, who sang in both Pagliacci and Iphigenia. I had not paid much attention to baritones or tenors before this piece, to be honest, but this time I tried to, because that's the thing to listen for. Then went to hear this Speight guy speak, because I simply wanted to see him in person after reading so much about him, and he seems on the ball and a good guy. I was sort of scared to ask my question, however, because I was afraid I would speak off-key and he would cringe or something awful like that. How does one even speak after an opera, is my question. There were some great lines in the piece, which I will perhaps repeat here at a different point. After that, went to have dinner at, well, Pagliacci, how could one not. Already planning out which weekend I'll come up for Tosca. In other news, went to the symphony yesterday with a pal and then tango dancing. Have tried to think of places to spend some final time in, and I think I've done most of it. Decided to pass on the dyke bar, which is just plain boring and lame, and can't really feel sentimental about it. Had wanted to see a little red show at some point, but maybe later. When I finally return my books to the library, will get to see that for the last time. Basta.
Half-packed and moving early next week. Like the new place, in a good place, heard I was accepted for it yesterday. Will miss the cats, but perhaps will get one or two of my own later. the new job goes well as I've done some things from long-distance.
Auf Wiedersehen, Seattle.
Half-packed and moving early next week. Like the new place, in a good place, heard I was accepted for it yesterday. Will miss the cats, but perhaps will get one or two of my own later. the new job goes well as I've done some things from long-distance.
Auf Wiedersehen, Seattle.
Montag, 7. Jänner 2008
why
Stanley Fish wrote in today's NYT:
"To the question “of what use are the humanities?”, the only honest answer is none whatsoever. And it is an answer that brings honor to its subject. Justification, after all, confers value on an activity from a perspective outside its performance. An activity that cannot be justified is an activity that refuses to regard itself as instrumental to some larger good. The humanities are their own good. There is nothing more to say, and anything that is said – even when it takes the form of Kronman’s inspiring cadences – diminishes the object of its supposed praise."
I love the humanities and probably always will.
I also think, however, there's something to be said for their place in and illumination of cultural context, as a part of a larger scenario.
The article makes some good points, many interesting comments, and is worth a read.
"To the question “of what use are the humanities?”, the only honest answer is none whatsoever. And it is an answer that brings honor to its subject. Justification, after all, confers value on an activity from a perspective outside its performance. An activity that cannot be justified is an activity that refuses to regard itself as instrumental to some larger good. The humanities are their own good. There is nothing more to say, and anything that is said – even when it takes the form of Kronman’s inspiring cadences – diminishes the object of its supposed praise."
I love the humanities and probably always will.
I also think, however, there's something to be said for their place in and illumination of cultural context, as a part of a larger scenario.
The article makes some good points, many interesting comments, and is worth a read.
Mittwoch, 2. Jänner 2008
snowbound
An adventurous holiday, got stuck on the wrong side of a pass the afternoon before I was supposed to fly out, as we were on our way back from the mountains. They didn't open the pass again until the following afternoon, and all alternate routes were also closed: lots of snow and very high winds. So we stayed at my uncle's dacha for the evening, which was near the pass, fortunately. So am flying out today now, two days later than originally planned, and changed my new year's plans.... all the snow meant great skiing. All the wind meant skiing at 40 below zero. It was great but at the end of it was a popsicle. only thing was forgot to bring some medicine with me, which has had me quite on edge in the last days, but better now. back to the apartment hunt and working....
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